Friday, September 9, 2011

How not to write a press release

Here's an example of how not to write a press release - the band name (and identifying words) have been changed to protect the guilty. All spacing and punctuation is from the press release:

Hello Writers of  Frisco Kids
The Giraffe Necks will be playing (branch) Library August 28th at 3:00 pm

 THE GIRAFFE NECKS, San Francisco's giraffe-faced pop stars playing their own combination of hard-rocking kid’s hits and favorites from the 60's, 70's, and 80's.
The catchy tunes, giraffe fun, and kooky kids will spiral into an interactive sing along dance party for all ages.

  Here is Our first Official Video     (Editor note: I deleted the link because the video was pretty bad)  

 We would appreciate any promotion you could give before our show next Sunday.
 If you would like an exclusive story about the colorful past of The Giraffe Necks.
I would be glad to give you an interview .
   Attached is my personal Bio That brags about my personal past and where I am at now.
 It needs to be updated and focus on The Giraffe Necks.  
          I hope to hear from you.
                    Thank you for your time .
                                                      (band leader name)

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