Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Stupid Products: Sky Mall Catalog

While flying over the winter break, we had the chance to pore over the Sky Mall catalog. WAY too many stupid products in there. Thought I'd share:

Now if you have an awesome Halloween haunted house every year (paging Jody), this may be a good purchase for you. But $100 for a life size zombie, "captured in quality designer resin with meticulous detail and finished so realistically that you'll swear you can hear him groaning!" Assemble it yourself - it arrives in 3 pieces.

You too can own your own roach clip dental napkin holder for only $8. "Ideal for dining out." Uh huh. If you're at a lobster restaurant. Or an old age home.

Because everyone needs their own Garden Yeti. Lifesize is only $2,250. "Sorry, flag not included." That made me spit out my coffee. "Our nearly six foot tall Garden Yeti will have guests doing a double-take as they admire your creative home or garden style!" Yeah, they'll be doing a double-take, knowing they will never again come to your house, because you're wiped off their social list.

Get your own 4 foot tall Countdown to Christmas Santa, for only $300. That on-board microchip will be able to keep track even if you lose power or have to plug him in somewhere else!

I have to admit this one is kind of funny. For $20 you can have fake hair in your visor. The bonus is SPF coverage of your bald pate!

I couldn't decide which of these was the worst. You have the Armadillo beverage holder for $20. I guess for those times you don't want to get beer rings on the wood table. It's "fully hand-painted one piece at a time." That job would suck.

Then there's the "Bigfoot, the Bashful Yeti Tree Sculpture." For $70 it can scare off the racoons. Yeah, probably not.

And your very own copy of the Belgian Manneken Pis sculpture. I'm so cultured I've actually seen the original. Though not dressed up in Judo attire, as you can see on this link. While an awesome conversation piece, this definitely does tie in with the Armadillo beer holder. You can "display this delightful sculpture in your gallery" - your GALLERY? Whoever buys this would definitely not have a gallery.

What are your favorite items from the Sky Mall catalog?